No poker today, just alcohol. Went to the b'day thing and it turned out good that I did. Good times. Glad to see that all the people I haven't seen in years are just as/more fucked up than me. The girls that everyone used to drool over now standing in a corner tonight, all 10-20lbs heavier complaining that they're not married yet. Yes, sometimes other people's misery does brighten my mood. Glad I went.

First official alcohol impaired post (in a whle at least).

Went in tonight with the thoughts I posted in my last post. Very 1st hand......

http://www.pokerhand.org/?561826

(As much as I hated the old hand converter, making people click a seperate link is even worse so here's the explanation.)

CO OPFR to $.75. I call w/ [7c].
HU 8J7 Flop. I check, he bets $1, I check raise to $3, he calls.
Turn 6. I bet $5. He calls.
River A. I bet $10, he pushes for $16.12 and I'm thinking it's gotta be AJ, but it's only AK played horribly.
I pick up $22.52 on my 1st hand.

Then....
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561830

Then....
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561832

Yup, had 3 people all in tonight.
Hand 1 - Me 100% after he pushed the river.
Hand 2 - Me 80% when he called all his money off.
Hand 3 - Me 78% when he pushed.
And guess fuckin what? I only win the hand where the other guy is drawing completely dead. Got an out, got a winner. I'm so fuckin sick of losing pots where either I or my opponent is all-in when I'm better 80% or better. I'm supposed to win 8 out of 10 not lose 8 out of 10. What should have been a nice easy winning session ends up a small loser again. It's just so..........

Eh, FUCK IT ALL!

So this month on AP these are the %'s of every hand where either I or my opp were all-in.

1 - 100% WIN (KT vs AA on a KT24K board - he called down all the way, never raised)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561852
+$11.85
2 - 5% LOSS (AA vs 63o on 7K66 board - He called 8x PFR then pot bet for 1/3 of stack on flop.
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561853
-$16.65
3 - 100% WIN (AJs vs KTs - same suit, we both hit the flush on the river.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561854
+$8
4 - 100% WIN (33 vs Q9s on a 34T3 board - he pushed FD on turn, I had quads)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561855
+$21.49
5 - 87% LOSS (QQ vs 99 on 635 board - Runner, runner inside straight.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561856
-$9.25
6 - 5% LOSS (KK vs QQ on 74Q5 board - he raised, called a re-raise, hit Q on flop.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561857
-$46.65
7 - 79% WIN (JJ vs AA on KQJ board - flopped a scary set vs Aces.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561862
+$14.40
8 - 100% WIN (74s vs JTo on 635J board - flopped straight, he pushed TP on turn.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561864
+$6.35
9 - 0% LOSS (KK vs A7s on 874Q2 board - he put in 1/3 stack on MPTK + BDFD)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561865
-$15.25
10 - 96% WIN (66 vs 63 on 36J board - self explanatory)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561867
+$13.35
11 - 28% LOSS (AQo vs A4s on 4AJ board - 2 pair beats 1 pair, he's short stacked)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561869
-$7.80
12 - 49% WIN (T9s vs AKs on 874 board - I pushed OESD, he called with OC's, I hit turn)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561871
+$7.10
13 - 66% LOSS (65o vs A4s on 365 board - battle of blinds, he bet flop, I raised, he push)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561874
$-17.75
14 - 100% WIN (42o vs A6s on 3A5Q board - battle of blinds again, I c/r turn, he push)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561879
+$9.55
15 - 80% WIN (ATo vs A9o on 456 board - he was a total maniac, he'd push with J2o)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561882
+$14.30
16 - 18% LOSS (KK vs AA all-in PF)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561886
-$37.48
17 - 0% LOSS (AJo vs 37s on 3AK47 board - he called 2 bets with BPNK and hit river)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561888
-$12.25
18 - 99.6% WIN (A9s vs K3o on 993 board - called off remainder of short stack on 3's.)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561890
+$6
19 - 100% WIN (87s vs AKs on 8J76A board - see above post)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561826
+$22.52
20 - 80% LOSS (AK vs A9 on A65 board - 3 outter)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561830
-$5
21 - 78% LOSS (AK vs A7s on 68A board - he hit runner-runner flush)
http://www.pokerhand.org/?561832
-$10

3-4 on hands where I put all my money in when I was 66% to 99% to win. And plenty of those hands I was a dog in, a good chunk of the money went in when I was a favorite. Notice that not once did I get somebody in with a big pair, QQ to AA, and actually win a hand. And look at how my opponents stack is always bigger on a losing hand than it is on a winning hand.

Played in the 2nd leg of that qualifier from yesterday this afternoon. 78 people, 10 tickets punched. Can't you just guess what happened? I went out 11th with QQ all-in at a 6 handed table. I was called by AK and TT. 10 on the flop. The disgusting beat machine that is AP continues. There was collusion on the other table to get the short stack through by constantly folding to him. I'm pretty pissed off about that too and reported it to AP. Someone suggested we do it at our table too and I stupidly said thank you, but I'm not begging, just playing as the 2nd shortest stack at the table.

I'm completely sick of the AP NL games. I'm just convinced you gotta blow someone there to avoid the horrendous beats. I have $376.68 left in my account and $105.90 in bonuses left to clear. I think I'm just going to move from $.25NL to $1/2 limit and clear the bonus as fast as possible and just get the money out of there then maybe deposit somewhere like Full Tilt. If I lose it all, then I'm done for a year or so. It's pointless to continue playing the $.25NL game as you'd know if you've read any of this journal the past few weeks and I'm not leaving $105.90 in possible bonuses behind or I'd pull out right now.

6 Hands in....
7 players and I pick up 2 black Aces 2 OTB. I limper and I raise to $1.25 and limper calls.
[9s][Kc] Pot $2.85
He checks, I bet $2.50 and he c/r to $5. ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDING ME? ARE WE STARTING ALREADY. I call.
$12.85
He checks. I'm think KQo since he didn't raise or flush draw. I bet $9 and he c/r again to $18. FU ALL-IN! for $24.40 more. Every fuckin time I take a flop with Aces someone has me crushed. No way. Show me it!
He folds.
+$22.20


Now all of a sudden I'm getting check-raised on the flop every time I preflop raise on this one table and on the other table I'll PFR and get 2 callers then one always bets the pot on the flop and I have to fold me miss.

Then.....
[8h] in BB. 2 dead posters and SB.
[5h][9s] Pot $1
I bet $.75 and two callers including SB.
$3.25
SB bets $2, I call.
$7.25
SB bets $8. BULLSHIT. He couldn't have called w/ BD FD or something like QT there. I HAVE to have him either beat or tied. I call. [6c]. ONLY CARD IN THE EFFIN DECK THAT HE CAN WIN A BIG POT WITH!!!
-$11

6 hands later
[6h] CO. 1 limper, I limp, BB checks.
[Kc][As] Pot $.85
2 checks, I bet $.75 and BB calls.
$2.35
BB checks, I bet $2 and he c/r to $4. ASSHOLE had been C/R me ever since I sat down. FU ALL-IN. He calls for the $4.75 he has left. [2c] 5 EFFIN OUTTER AGAIN!!!!
Every damn time I make a hand.

10 hands later [Ac] AGAIN.
I limp UTG+1. Very tight player PFR to $1 from UTG+2. SB calls $1. I re-raise to $5.25. UTG+1 has $21.30 left. He calls, SB folds. I have him. Flop xTJ. I'm worried, but the pot is $11.75 and he only has $17.05 left so I put him in. Take a FUCKIN GUESS....
FUCKIN AP FUCKIN AP FUCKIN AP FUCKIN AP FUCKIN AP FUCKIN AP





I played those Aces perfectly. He called off 1/4 of his stack dominated. Everytime I get them to do that I get stacked.

5,617 hands of NL at all levels on AP - (-9.30 PTBB/100) That's just sick. Even a bad or extremely unlucky player shouldn't be this bad. And I'm not even just posting the bad hands. I post every one of the bigger pots I play. I start out way ahead, put my money in and then get CRUSHED all the EFFIN TIME!

Holy Crap, is anyone ready for my 1st positive post in this journal since last month? First off, props to John Maine, Jose Reyes and company for keeping us alive tonight. Yes, I say us because once the post-season starts, I am officially part of the team. If they had lost this game, I'm not sure Billy Wagner would have made it out of Shea Stadium. Willie Randolph and Mota almost got run out of NY tonight. Even though Duncan grounded into a double play I can't understand the lovefest he has with Mota. I still think it was the wrong move and when I initially saw Mota in the game, my first thought was......



I get even more of a rush out of the Mets in the post season than I do out of poker or any game I have a financial interest in it. It has even taken me by surprise, but in a good way. Glad to know I'm still passionate about something.

Maybe the Mets threw me some good luck tonight as well. Moved to the $1/2 Limit game as stated yesterday and made a $3.75 profit. Cleared $20 of bonus as well. I know that doesn't sound like much, but the way things have been going, that's a pretty major victory. I actually should have had a much larger win, but I hung around a table too long after it broke up. Played 4 and 3 handed and I took thinks like TPTK and 2 pair too far. My bad, I thought those were good hands against only 3 other players. Lost half a stack in less than 10 minutes. Ugh!

I haven't played Limit in a while so I thought my game might be rusty, but not really so, or at least maybe will let me know with some of the hands I post here. (PS - I still have no idea how to post graphs. I'm probably an idiot.) I did make one semi-bonehead play and called on what turned out to be a 4 outter, but I hit it and took a big pot of someone with a set. Huh, imagine that...a 4 outter hitting against a set at AP! Who woulda thought? Finally one turned my way, but then again I don't often get into situations where I'm that far behind until after the money goes in. I did vent a little at a player who bad beat me toward the end and he gave me a math lesson. Some funny stuff there.

It all started kinda sick. At the same time on 2 table, the very 1st flop I saw on each table was 777 right next to each other. Freaky! I thought this was gonna be another ugly session when I flopped top set on a monotone board and then a 4th club showed up. I can't seem to win top set hands. Things got better though.

Here's my big suckout. I thought I had about 7 outs w/ 2 overcards and the nut straight draw, although I could only count 3 pure outs. Turned out I did have 4 outs and this was a bad call getting 6-1, but I actually ended up getting paid off handsomely.

http://www.pokerhand.org/?565296

I went 0 for 4 w/ pocket 9's and was only 1 for 2 with Kings, but the big pairs otherwise treated me well as I picked up 5.25 BB when I limp re-raised Aces then flopped a set and was even able to get in another c/r. That felt different.

So here are all 7 hands I played 4 handed or less. Now that I look at it, I only actually lost 9.25 BB, just felt like more.
4 Handed -
- KTo OTB - UTG limps, I raise. BB, UTG call. Flop T6Q. UTG has 66.
3 Handed -
- QJo BB - free pass - Flop Q83 - SB bets, I raise, he calls. Turn K. He has K3.
- 98s SB - I flop MP on monotone board and take it with a bet.
- AQo OTB - I raise, BB calls. Flop x3J. He has A3. I lose.
- AQo BB - 2 hands in a row. SB limps, I raise, he calls. Q on flop, he check/folds.
2 Handed
- A9s SB - I PFR, he calls. 472 flop, none my suit. I bet, he raises. I call then check/fold a turn blank.
- Q2o BB - He folds PF and leaves.

6 out of 7 very playable hands. QJ hand and AQ vs A3 were just bad luck, or typical AP hands.

I had one other major suckout, a 2 outter but this idiot deserved it for calling a PFR coming UTG w/ K6o in the BB.

http://www.pokerhand.org/?565319

A Math Lesson For All
So first this hand takes place.....
http://www.pokerhand.org/?565320

Seems like everytime I think I'm value betting, somebody has runner-runnered me. Afterward I ask if he had really called me down w/ KTo. He says that he had a pair and a flush draw. I said there was an Ace and only 1 heart on the flop. Then he comes up with this....
"I had a K on the flop, that's like 5 outs and I was getting 5 to 1. Good enough."
I was laughing too hard to reply. Then he told me had 9 more outs on the turn like he knew the heart was coming.
Then a few hands later he calls me down with a GSSD and an overcard. Too funny.

Took a small beating over 159 hands of 1/2 limit this afternoon, but it probably should have been worse. I only lost $18.75, but I got crushed with all my big pairs, some in big pots, and I didn't complete any of my draws. I think I got away from some trouble hands rather cheaply. I may have been a bit gunshy on my last big pair hand with an OC on board and cost myself a bet. You be the judge.

Here are all my big pairs for the day. I finished -2.75BB from AA-TT combined.

1 - My 3rd hand. http://www.pokerhand.org/?566256
KK OTB. EP raiser and caller in front of me, I 3 bet.
J-hi flop, no draws. 1st raiser bets into me, 2nd calls, I raise, both call.
Turn blank, checked to me, I bet, both call.
River A. 1st raiser bets into me again, 2nd folds, and I have to call with 12BB in the pot.
He had AJ.
-4.5 BB
2 - JJ in the BB. 1 limper 2 off the button. K on the flop, he calls. Q on the turn, he raises, I fold.
-2.5 BB

In between, at the other table, I beat the same guy again with KQo against his 99. Unlike last night however, I hit the K on the flop and check/called him all the way down while OOP. Amazingly, he fired 3 barrells with 3 OC's on board.

3 - [Ah] in the SB folded to me. I raise, BB calls. Flop [Qc][Ts]. I bet, he raises, I 3-bet (perhaps tilting here). He calls. I fire turn and river blanks and he just calls. He had [Js]. Sick, but I guess AP always has to get their rake.
+4 BB

4 - Two black Kings again OTB. 3 bet, BB called 2 bets then bet out A on flop. Easy fold.
-1.5 BB

5- TT UTG - I raise, SB+BB all. KQ7 of clubs on the flop. I don't have a club. SB bets, BB calls, easy fold again.
-1 BB

Overcard on every flop so on the last big pair...
6 - QQ - UTG PFR, I 3 bet in MP. Heads up. Flop is K hi w/ 2 diamonds. I bet and he calls. I figured he had to have AK or KQ. Checked it down and he actually had [Jd]. I figure I probably should have bet the river, but he's only calling if he has a King.
+3 BB

I was pretty depressed about that Mets loss last night, but pokerwise I ended up playing 2 small satellites afterward. My head really wasn't in them and that actually showed as I made a pretty funny mistake and ended up getting what I deserved. The 1st was a Stage 1 satellite to the $100K tourny and the 2nd was the $1.5K Guarranteed which started 40 minutes later.

Anyway, while I was playing both simultaneously, the following hands occurred almost at the same time.
1 - In the $1.5K Guarranteed I picked up [6h] UTG. As I was re-adjusting the 2 tables on my screen, I accidentally hit the min-raise button. Pretty funny, but a horrible feeling. I guess I got what I deserved. The worst part was....I HAD TO SHOW IT DOWN!
http://www.pokerhand.org/?567892

2 - At about the same time, I picked up AA in the satellite. I was fairly comfortable as far as stack sizes went and was happy just to pick up some hands pre-flop like this one, but this guy decides to call me with 2's.
http://www.pokerhand.org/?567901
The worst part of this wasn't loosing, but that he actually trash talked me afterwards telling me how great he was, how much I sucked, and how he just kicked me "azz". I actually thought it was pretty funny and mostly agreed with him until I sent him packing shortly after.
http://www.pokerhand.org/?567905

Punched my ticket fairly easily in the satellite after that. Played only a couple of more hands the rest of the way. One time I over-pushed KK OTB vs 2 limpers and they folded. I even folded an AKs limped to me later on because there was absolutely no reason to play it against bigger stacks at that point.

Tough bust in the other one though. AKs vs AQs. I actually flopped a 15 outter, but that's not what you want at AP. It's only the 5 outs or less that are gold.
http://www.pokerhand.org/?567908

241 hands of 1/2 limit tonight. (-7.75). It was actually much worse, but the only stupid move I made cracked Aces and gave me the biggest pot of the night. Any board that gets them their rake I guess.

A lot of the same stuff tonight. Most of my PFR's seemed to backfire.
The losers....
-Open PFR A7o CO - SB 3 bet AKo - I folded flop.
-Open PFR AQ - SB and BB call - BB flops trips - I folded c/r on flop.
-Open PFR A7s MP - 3 bet by Button (5 of 12 PFR in CO/OTB), but I completely missed and had to fold flop.
-Open PFR AJo MP - Cold Called by QJo behind, I flop TPGK, he calls and hits gutshot on turn. Only lost 2.5 BB luckily because he checked the turn behind with the nuts
-PFR AQo CO in my 1 short handed (6) hand of the night after 1 limper. Flopped TP, BB turned Flush.
-Open PFR KQo in SB - BB calls. Heads Up Flop QAA - He has A8.
-Open PFR A9o OTB. BB 3 bets. Flop Axx. He bet flop then called my raise, called a turn blank then checked a river Jack. I checked behind not allowing him to c/r his 2 outter. He had JJ. I got away losing 3.5 BB. Like I said, anything for the rake. Blinds had a hand or hit one almost every time.
-Over aggressive player open PFR in CO, I 3 bet AKo in SB. He has QT and hits 2 pair.
-Open PFR QJs MP3 - new poster in CO 3 bets w/ AQ and I flop TP w/ open-ender so I have to take it to the end.

No action.....
-Open PFR AJo MP - no action
-Open PFR A8o CO - no action

The winners.....
-Open PFR KQs OTB - SB 3 bets, 6A6 flop but he checks it down. I river flush and collect a bet.
-Open PFR JJ in MP - 2 callers who fold K-high flop - whew!
-AA in CO. Had BB call me down to the river then fold. That was different in a positive way.
-3 bet AKs in SB - I flop TPTK, original raiser flops 2 pair. Board pairs on river giving me higher 2 pair.
-Here's a semi-sick one. Over-aggressive player open PFR CO, I 3 bet JJ OTB. Flop is AAA and he goes off, betting, raising the entire way and shows 22. I slowed down on the turn and only collected 4BB.
-And here's the biggest mistake I made all session, which is only really bad PF and not even all that horrible....+7.5BB
http://www.pokerhand.org/?568422
Like I said, AP isn't necessarily biased against me, they just want their rake.

So my pre-flop raises were successful only 40% of the time with 2 of them being neutral. I'd like to get that number closer to 50% and possibly even over and then hopefully I can be a consistant winner.

Played in the 2nd leg of the satellite I qualified for last night and it really looked like I might bubble, but the big stacks (who definitely did not understand the concept of satellite play) were going off near the end and eliminating each other. There was a sick hand on the other table at the bubble where a smallish stack PFR and was flat called by the shortest stack on OTB. Flop xxK all diamonds. If the Button loses, I'm in, if the other player loses, he's the new short stack. They both get it in on that flop. Smallish stack has KK for a set, shortest stack has AA and it looks like he's done when an A falls on the turn. (Doesn't AP realize there's no rake to be made here?)

A few hands later it looked like the KK player was going out, but he hit a 2 outter on the river so play continued. I ended up the short stack pretty soon, but two of the bigger stacks went off again and one ended up crippling himself and being blinded out 2 hands later. I went out next finishing 17th out of 135. I didn't get a ticket, but I did end up with the 2100 points which was the consolation prize. Not too bad a deal considering my original entry was only 50 points.

Also cleared another $10 of the bonus. Since I redeposited, I'm down $122.27 but have cleared $40 of the bonus with $75.90 left to clear so I still have some work to do to try and finish in the positive.

Just finished up 2 hours and 206 hands of 1/2 limit. Somewhere along, the normal AP 1/2 game went from TAG to LAG. Table VP$IP's of 25 on both tables for most of the night and I even saw a $50+ pot. Then, all of a sudden, during the last half hour the loose players all left and the whole table filled up with rocks. Still, I don't ever remember seeing those games soo loose for so long. Usually table VP$IP's of 20 or less.

Lost 2 big pots to 3 outters within my first 25 hands and then another one to a backdoor flush not too long afterwards. Seems like I've been on the wrong end of a LOT of those lately. I was still able to finish up $3.50 + clear another $10 of the bonus. I would have liked to have won just one of those 3 outter pots though.

Even though I finished slightly up for the night, for some reason, it just doesn't seem as much fun as it used to. It feels like work, something I have to do instead of something I want to do. Strange thing happened tonight. I got that sick feeling before I even sat at a table. That feeling that is reserved when your holding Aces and your pretty sure someone has a set or two pair, but the size of the pot is forcing you to call anyway. That horrible feeling reserved for the worst of beats. It's not tilt. Tilt for me is anger or frustration or both. I just feel sick. I feel sick whenever I get a hand like AA-JJ or AK/AQ even before I raise. I find myself just hoping for hands that I can easily get away from instead of those hands. I don't back off on those hands. I still force myself to play them the way they should be played, aggressively. (Unless it's too passive to check the river w/ KK OOP vs 2 when that river is the , putting 3 clubs on the board as well. I'm actually pretty shocked to have won that hand.)

I know I'm not the only one running bad here. I've read Alex's and Pozzo's journal and I sympathize with them greatly. There are some others that I even envy a little, like Piers because he's so happy with what he's doing now, or even Xaston a little, but because he's making a lot of money. More because of the high level he is already playing successfully at such a young age. I'd love to go back a few years and have his poker career ahead of me, but I was just an idiot college kid who drank a lot and thought he could make a ton of money playing blackjack when I was 20. You know, kinda like every other idiot college kid.

I've been following the recent discussion about luck and evening out over a long sample size and without any statistical evidence to back this up, here is my opinion on it. The cards don't know whether your running good or bad. They don't know that they are supposed to fall a certain way to even you out now because you've been running so one sided. So, no, I don't agree that it all evens out for each person. It probably evens out for everyone combined on the planet, but not for every individual person.

I remember hearing recently (maybe it was Gavin Smith on "The Circuit") someone saying that most pro players started out their career running well. I understand what he meant. I hope I don't continue to feel this way everytime I sit down, but if I do, I'm not sure what's next for me pokerwise. At least from an online standpoint. I don't have enough of a bankroll to play live regularly yet, but I was thiking about what Cactus said in my "live bankroll" post in the Bankroll forum even before he posted it. I don't need the entire bankroll in my pocket before I even attempt to play. So right now, the plan is to finish up the AP bonus, which will probably take another week, see how I feel, and go from there.

Trying to blow off some steam this evening in a $1 Rebuy and somehow I ended up in a 5 hour affair. Picked up QQ fairly early and pushed OTB after a min-raise and a cold call. Got called by K9s and a King hit the flop. I rebought for a double stack again. Nothing happened and at the end of the rebuy period I was sitting somewhere around 2,000. Said the hell with adding on and I figured I'd be out early in the 2nd hour. Then all of a sudden I caught fire and before I knew it, I had tripled up and was up over 20,000 and I still didn't even know what the hell I was doing in this thing. At one point I was down to 10,000 again, but doubled up soon after and pretty much cruised to the final 2 tables. I squeeked onto the final table, lost a coin flip and then went card dead. So 5 hours later I had finished 8th out of 329 for a puny $31.20 minus the $4 it cost me. I don't even know why I played, but even though it wasn't a lot of money, I actually felt great about the way I played and I guess that's pretty important. It feels like even more of an accomplishment because out of 280 hands I was never dealt KK,AA, or AK. And the only time I saw QQ, I lost early on. I just made great decisions, great bets, and great calls. Like I said, not really any money at all (fell short of even making me even for the day), but a real boost from a confidence standpoint.

Played a late MTT as well. Went out about mid-way through the 2nd hour about 20 before the bubble. My opponent made a terrible call with a GSSD and 1 overcard. He was actually ahead with his Ace, but I had a flush and straight draw and had pushed for almost twice the size of the pot.
I had 14 outs and missed, but I defintely made the right push.
Result
http://twodimes.net/h/?z=2145308
pokenum -h ks js - as jc -- 6s th qs
Holdem Hi: 990 enumerated boards containing Qs 6s Th
cards win %win lose %lose tie %tie EV
Ks Js 480 48.48 501 50.61 9 0.91 0.489
As Jc 501 50.61 480 48.48 9 0.91 0.511

Interestingly enough, counting the early post and the Rebuy, that was 7x today I flopped 12 outs or more and I missed ALL 7 today. What are the odds of that? 4 outers or less falling like made, but forget about when you have 12 outs or more.