by kennyg » Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:11 am
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
A slap to the face
Current mood: hopeful
After taking bad beats, bad luck, and bad cards for over a week... I've lost my confidence. I think my play has gone awry. Today I watched myself make a call with two pair even though my instincts told me to fold. But I couldn't fold...they couldn't have outdrew me "again?!" I had to see it for myself. He had the straight...just the thing I put him on when he minimum raised me on the turn.
The thing is...these sessions I've been having are pretty much unbeatable. Not even the greats could overcome the hands I have run into. Nut straights losing to nut flushes, AK vs AK losing to a 4 to the flush on the river etc etc. I could go on and on. There's no point.
The point is I'm bleeding money away rapidly. I should not be losing as much as I am. I'm being drained of my money, my bankroll, my confidence, and my skill as a poker player.
This is a test of my devotion to playing poker for a living. I will pass it. I will make it through this shit and become a better player for it. I'm a professional. This is what I do.
Starting tommorow I'm moving back down to the 1/2 tables. I'm going to reread TJ Cloutier's NL Championship Holdem. I will budget myself more properly. No more of these crazy spending on HDTVs and lavish nights out. It's nitty gritty time. This is what I do.
As I write this entry, I know my emotions can take a little beating. I will weather this storm and every other cloud in that damned sky. This is what I do.
So I say bring it on dealer. Keep giving me shitty cards. Keep giving me bad luck and bad beats. Who will give in first?
Currently watching:
The Phantom of the Opera (2-Disc Special Edition)
Release date: By 03 May, 2005
"I'll take KennyGs advice before Sklanskys every time. "
-Iceman
Proud contributing member of the Poker Player's Alliance.
Poker Journal:
forum/viewtopic.php?p=14017#14017